You may have noticed the blog has been pretty bare over the past couple of weeks. This happens from time to time – for about a year, I’ve been making the occasional post that doesn’t address a current or past news event, but instead my view on gematria, which has greatly evolved over the past 4 years since I first discovered it.
In summary: The more I decode and pay close attention to what’s happening, not only in the mainstream media, but in my own personal life, the less I think is being controlled by some human conspiracy. Is there a conspiratorial element involving gematria? I have no doubt there is. But over time, I came to the realization that the presence of a numerical riddle that combines gematria with date durations and numerologies is not strictly evidence of a conspiracy. Rather, manifestation in the material world must happen by some sort of numerical code. While we may be able to recognize remnants of that code after manifestation has occurred, in no way whatsoever do we possess the ability to fully grasp and understand it. Nor should we always be trying to use it as proof of a man-made conspiracy.
It’s no secret that I learned about gematria first from Zachary K. Hubbard. His videos completely stood out from other conspiracy-related material at the time, and it was the only channel where I felt like I was learning something. In my early YouTube videos, I even mimicked his message and pushed the same narrative. I don’t have any regrets about this, as it was a necessary part of my development that led me to where I am today and where I will be in the future.
For the longest time, I fully supported Zach’s work, and still do to a fair extent to this day. If Zach ever turned out to be the product of some advanced psychological operation, or a “shill” as some people would call it, I would be as shocked as anyone. I say this for a number of reasons, perhaps the biggest of which is due to his willingness to share my work on his first YouTube channel after only speaking with me for barely an hour. As far as he knew, I could have been there to completely sabotage his work and message. But, say what you want to about Zach – he’s extremely passionate about his message and he will take risks if it means waking more people up. In my case, it worked out for the most part…maybe not so much when it came to the All4Truth partnership.
Through 2019, I wound up stepping back from associations with Mr. Hubbard as it felt like we were on slightly different paths. Time after time, I found myself questioning my own posts, wondering how “Murder by Numbers” riddles could be so perfect. I stopped titling my posts and videos as such, and began simply discussing the numerology of a death, as it was becoming increasingly difficult to differentiate what was “organic” numerology, and what was being done by stone cold kabbalists at a table behind locked doors.
Zach aggressively opposed my suggestions that not every death he decodes is a murder, and that never sat well with me. This led to a period of self-evaluation; a lot of my beliefs about the world at the time had been molded by his work, and I felt I needed to take a step back with that understanding and open myself back up to new ideas. After all – yes, Zach discovered gematria. But when Christopher Columbus discovered America, he thought it was the East Indies…
Something I’ve been giving thought to in regards to all of this lately is money. For over 3 years, I have not attempted to make a single dime off of my work. Recently, I asked people to donate to my PayPal to help pay for the website’s server renewal in January, but that was only so I don’t actually lose money doing gematria.
The #1 reason I don’t have ads on my website, don’t have a Patreon, and don’t ask for money is because I don’t want anyone to come to the website, see that I’m profiting, and think “this is bullshit, this guy’s just making money.” Fuck money. My job pays me money. As much as I enjoy having money to live off of, there are many things I despise about it. Unfortunately, one of those things directly pertains to what I’m trying to spread, which is the concept that gematria is the language of our creator, and with it we have a window to the inner workings of the universe. I’m not trying to SELL that concept – I’m trying to SPREAD it. Raising human consciousness to a higher level of understanding is almost all I care about, and I would much rather achieve that goal and be poor than die a rich man.
This should not be interpreted as a knock on Zach – I fully support his decision to open up a Patreon and make as much money as he can. The man has worked his ass off, his impact on human consciousness has been monumental, and we will ultimately be better off thanks to his efforts. So as long as people are willing to throw money his way, more power to him.
Unfortunately, I think this decision has the ability to affect someone’s character or judgment. So when Zach raised his voice, calling my idea that not everyone gets murdered ridiculous, I can’t be 100% certain that it’s really just Zach’s heart speaking. Because his quality of life is somewhat dependent on the income he makes from gematria, bringing his expertise on it into question, especially live on the air, has potential to negatively affect his livelihood. Again, while I fully support the decision to make an income from gematria, I think doing so brings forces other than just pure truth-seeking to the surface.
This post wound up being something totally different than I had intended when I began writing it. I didn’t mean to make it about Zach, but my development over the past year can’t really be explained without that part of the story. I continue to wish him all the best, and I hope he’s able to build a big enough platform capable of sharing gematria with the world. While I’m concerned about the message, I have faith that all will balance out in the end, and whatever growth the both of us need to achieve during our time in this incarnation will occur. I’m easy to reach if he ever feels the need to talk about it. For me, right now, I just need some time away from exploring the matrix so I can instead try to enjoy its fruits.